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15th June 2000, 19:28 - Thursday. (After asking.)

Well now you see what you wanna be,
Just have your party on TV.

A sentiment is far more powerful when said eloquently. As would this be, if I could remember the original phrasing. 

Once I was in love, 
And it was divine, 
Soon found out, 
I was losing my mind.   <- This point and before = true.  
Seemed like the real thing,
But I was so blind.   <- How? Why? How can you not notice that love is a big fake? 

Maybe I should introduce my mind/death theories at this point, or perhaps clear up with issues about my love life. Perhaps not though. 

Fuck off little Word helper git face. 

Okay, I can’t believe Joss Whedon thought the Matrix was well written, give me a break. 

Hmmm, I need more water, my saliva’s getting thick again. Maybe a decent chair too. I think I could get a decent job in computing already. But noooo, don’t want a goddamn day fuck-off job. Creativity is all. What else is there? All I want is getting paid and creativity. I still can’t believe Mary Sandilands thought me and the twins writing a silly pencil cartoon with SunFlower, And all that was imaginative. Maybe she was taking the piss. I doubt is I could tell back then, but I don’t think so. 

And Nicky, whoa, Lone Ranger of school insulting. She’s like Veronica Anti-thesis. Me, without the gay bit, it’s totally weird. No, it is!. Perhaps if I’d had more confidence too… Okay, me and a younger sister, instead of an older brother, plus bording school, wich of course I would have gone too, since Nathan did. Jesus. That’s scarey. Plus I practically wrote one of her incidents in that Candy Story. Weird. Nah, can’t be bothered with surprise. It’d be no surprise to find out we were all as predictable as shite at school now would it? 

And annoying people who’re CEO’s at 6 or something. Fuck em’. I was near one of those, back in the days. Now, I hate the corny bastards for making everyone else feel slow. Well fuck you, little miss who went to cambridge at 12, how’d it feel to go through puberty at university? I hope it’s fucked up your emotional life brilliantly. Bitch even makes me look normal. Bitch! Damn you. I’m clever, not the cleverest, I’m ahead of my years, not that ahead, I’m Not new, just another variation within the continuum, not pushing it’s boundaries. Fuck. I’m me. Why is that never enough? Why define myself by abstraction?  Why SELF ANALYSE!!!!!!!

Hand shaking moment there. 

And Fliss, does she really think all the time? Even when just moving in time? Watching your eyes from behind as you move them to a new object? Which reminds me, like, you think you know how to see, like Fuck you do. (I know, I like the word.) Humans can’t see, it’s just your brain tricking you, all you have to do is look at a face upside down to see (PUN!) that you don’t even know how to look. Saw a picture upside down, I knew the woman was looking upwards, (I’d copied her features into Photoshop) but I thought, what the fuck? She’s looking straight ahead now? Nope, she was still looking up, I just couldn’t see it. We weren’t made to see faces upside down. We can’t see faces as well negatised either. We can’t even spot the mona lisa frowning when she’s upside down. And looking about, ever thought about looking about when your in a car, you don’t choose what to look at, soething catches your eye, you look. Think about it next time your on a journey. 

Oh what was the point of that? I only remember episodes and re-analyse them. I think too, but it’s more based on getting a jolt from something that bangs my brain into action. 

 SunFlower - Simpleton of the Jungle. Aye.
Wolfit, A wolf in sheeps clothing.  The Monkey Thing, what was that called? Puffer Jacket Girl, Puke MoonWalker, Barf Wader, Oh! The barfing contest! Brill. Meghan, Tiger hand, Pike. Radio Fart, the Pina Colada.  
Monkey Boy? Was that it? Queen of the swingers? I can’t remember. Damn. 

Challenged Xena Warrior Princess to a game of Badminton in a dream… Which was nice. 
 

Author information goes here. < That's Me! Or Meg if you want my full name. 
Copyright © 1999 by [weirdscience]. Most rights reserved.
Revised: 27 May 2000 21:14:14 +0100 .